This is very customary and nobody should expect you to pay the entire bill. Maybe you could supply the first drink and have someone make a toast. Have a family member do the invitations with an explanation that each will be expected to meet their own costs. Family will already know your circumstances and not be expecting you to shell out.





Best wishes.

I guess you say "please come to dinner with us, and bring cash or a credit card because we can't afford to buy dinner for everyone we're inviting". Might as well call a spade a spade.





What I cannot understand is why you "need" to invite all these people to dinner. You didn't explain that.





It is, however, a tacky thing to do to invite people to something like that and ask them to pay for it themselves. I think what I would do in this case is invite them to something you can afford, such as the coffee, sandwiches, and wedding cake kind of refreshments, which another poster has also suggested. You could ask one or more of these close friends and family members to chip in and provide the needed dinner(can 8 of them come up with $50 each?) or to make the invitation with the "self-pay" proviso, but frankly the second option would make me feel like such a cheapskate that I couldn't do it.





I can certainly understand the courthouse wedding now and the big splashy wedding later if you really want it, though I consider splashy weddings a huge waste of money especially for a couple who cannot currently come up with $400--are you planning on winning a lottery in the next year, or are you guaranteed to inherit money--but I do not understand why a courthouse wedding must be accompanied by a dinner for all the attendees.

There's a term for that. You invite them to a "no-host" dinner. If they know the term they should know they'll have to pay their own tabs. Another thing you could do is ask a family member or bridesmaid



to handle the inviting for you. She could explain for you that you and your husband would like to celebrate after the courthouse wedding, but that it will have to be no host and that the big bash will be next year.

You can host a perfectly acceptable party at home with tea, coffee, sandwiches and wedding cake in your own home. What you want and what you can afford are obviously two different things so be a big girl, learn to budget and go with what you afford. Save the. Sit down meal for you fake, do over wedding next year

I agree with the persons response before me let the brides maids contact your friend and tell them it is a No Host party.

Since apparently no one understood my last similar question, i will ask again... I UNDERSTAND that it is less than acceptable to ask guests to come to dinner and not pay for them. I am getting legally married this year, and having a formal wedding next year where i will be providing all the normal wedding stuff (yes i know it's strange, yes i know i should just do it all next year). Realize that all of the people coming to my courthouse wedding are very close family and friends (ex. Siblings, parents, grandparents, etc). I also understand that i should not "host" a party without having the means to and the rude comments are not necessary. None the less, i need to invite my family and friends to dinner after our courthouse wedding and ask them to pay for themselves. If i had $400+ to pay for everyone i would, but life isnt always easy like that. I am not going to change how i want things done, i am not going to not invite people to dinner and i am not going to wait til next year, we've decided what we want so please, take your negative comments elsewhere.